- 3 Tell-Tale Signs of an Internet Dating Scam and What To Do - May 9, 2021
- Do You Love a Man With Asperger’s? Here’s How to Date Him [BOOK] - December 18, 2018
- Getting Past Your Breakup Book Review - December 17, 2018
Have you found a few New Years resolutions for singles yet, or are you still searching for one or two that resonate?
It’s tricky when you’re single, right?
You want to focus on attracting a healthy, happy relationship, and yet, it’s not like there’s some magic wand you can wave and *poof* suddenly they appear.
Intention helps, as does focus.
So, perhaps a New Years resolution for singles might just fit the bill?
What follows are ten resolutions shared by singles, dating professionals and counselors that you can explore and possibly adopt as your own.
Already have something perfect? Scroll down and share in the comments. We’d love to hear them!
Table of Contents
Smile and Say “Hi” More Often
“I can smile, chat, and amuse any guy I’m not interested in — or any guy who approaches me.
But, let me see a guy on the train, walking by, or across the room who causes that punch-to-my-stomach gasp, and I will avoid eye contact, not smile, and otherwise ignore him. I think it’s a fear of rejection thing.
Well, this resolution will increase my tolerance for rejection, while making me more approachable.” – Rachelle Chase, erotic romance author and speaker, San Francisco, CA.
Meet Other, Like-Minded Singles
“My New Year’s resolution is to change my daily routine (i.e. different Starbucks, different location of gym, different time of day at gym, new classes (spin, boot camp, etc). so I meet new people and encounter new people.
By changing my daily routine, I am more likely to meet new people and possibly meet new people to date doing the things I love to do.” – Frank Mastronuzzi, owner of OneGoodLove, West Hollywood, CA.
Give Your Dates a Chance
Dr. Thea Lobell, Ph.D., a psychotherapist out of Baton Rouge, LA, believes that one of the most important New Years resolutions for singles to make is that of giving people second chances.
She clarifies: “Date someone two times before deciding about the person. It’s not uncommon for people to be nervous on a first date.
Due to nerves, people are rarely able to highlight their strengths on a first encounter. Unless the person is blatantly offensive, give them the benefit of the doubt and go on a second date.”
Lose the Negativity
Says Arielle Ford, author of The Soulmate Secret, “Vow to give up the pity party and negative thinking about love, romance and dating. If you believe there is enough air to breathe and water to drink, then I encourage you to believe there is more than enough love for you.
Become a magnet for love this year. Give more of what you want to receive. More attention, more affection, more love and watch what happens!”
Dr. Colleen Long, Psy.D., also known as the Happiness Diva, suggests: “‘You have to know where you are going, if you want to actually get there.’
This is a saying we have in the south which still holds true in the world of dating and relationships.
Many times, people make the mistake of just taking whatever life throws their way. However, if we are to truly get what we want and desire, we must first articulate those things to ourselves.
Start by sitting down and making a list of the things you desire in a partner. They may start out very general such as, ‘must be attractive,’ but soon they will develop into more specific to you items, like ‘must make me laugh until I cry.'”
Cultivate A Relationship With Yourself
“I notice that many women including myself have set aside their career and personal goals for their significant others. I was one of them. I have set myself back in terms of my success for many years applying all of my energy into relationships.
My New Year’s resolution: Love myself and take care of myself first prior to loving anyone else.
If I am not happy with myself, I’ll find myself in unhealthy and potentially destructive relationships.
Like Carrie said in Sex in the City, ‘The most exciting, challenging and significant relationship of all is the one you have with yourself. And if you find someone to love the you you love, well, that’s just fabulous.'” – Jeanine Swatton, author of Women Crossing Bridges, Dublin, CA.
Set Relationship Boundaries
“Promise to set boundaries with people who drain your time and energy – family, friends, people you may feel sorry for.
Relationships need to be give and take. When they aren’t, they drain you and take away time you need for your own happiness and your true friends.” – Carolyn Bushong, L.P.C., author of Bring Back the Man You Fell in Love With.
Create Your Own Dating Rules
“As a single, 20-something in New York, I resolve to do what feels most true to my nature on all of my dates.
For me, this often means forgetting about the rules that society dictates about how men and women should interact in the early stages of relationships.
It means trusting my gut about when to become involved sexually, when it’s okay to call, or when to tell a guy how strong (or weak) my feelings are. Ultimately, I resolve to do what I want!” – Rachel Russo, Marriage and Family Therapist Trainee and Professional Matchmaker.
Make a Plan
Megan L. Reese, a divorced woman in West Grove, PA, suggests an innovative idea. “After five years of dating, relationships and bad experiences, I’ve taken a very proactive approach to dating this year. I am writing a business plan.
As a businesswoman, every year I write a business plan that outlines my goals, strategies, timelines, etc. I thought, ‘Why aren’t I being this intentional in my personal life?’
My ‘Man Plan’ includes a vision and mission statement, goals, marketing, budget, strategic partnerships and metrics for measuring my efforts.”
Use Feng Shui To Increase Your Odds
An unusual twist on the New Year’s resolution is to use energy cues to get you where you want to be, says Chriss Barr, a Feng Shui expert and owner of Palm Beach Feng Shui.
She expands: “The best thing you can do is to sit facing your relationship direction when you’re out to dinner or meeting someone new on a first date. Feng Shui bases your relationship direction on your birthday and is unique to you.
When you use your personal relationship direction, you make a better connection with your partner and they’re more receptive to you. Another great idea is to wear colors associated with your personal relationship direction.
BONUS Singles New Years Resolution
For some of us, there’s a need for extra guidance and support with love. So why not grab a book, or course, to help you along the path?
Grabbing one for the New Year only enhances the other resolutions above. Plus, it’ll keep you on track with regular reminders to check in, or keep on reading, or give you action tasks to complete.
Our recommendation? Flip the Single Switch, a 5-Day Challenge in book format, to start the year off properly.
After reading this article, you’ve got more than a handful of choices, or at the very least ideas to draw upon and create your own resolution.
Did any of them resonate?
If so, write them down. Commit them to memory or just jot it (or them) into your calendar planner.
That way, come January 16th – when most folks either forget or give up on their New Years resolutions – you’ll stay on task and focused.
Any daily reminder, works.
Then, when you’re faced with something that doesn’t align with your resolution, you can point to it and say, “Sorry, I need to attend more events where there are single folks,” or, “Wait a minute, I said I’d create some healthy boundaries. Why am I texting my ex?”
Any New Years Resolutions for Singles Suggestions?
Do you have any NYE resolutions that helped you find love? Or, if you’re coupled up and never made a resolution when you were single, what would you suggest now?
And for those of you unpartnered, which resolution for singles makes your heart sing? Did we miss any? Please scroll down and share in the comments.